Unexpected Authenticity...

Connecting people everday to the real Jesus in a real way.

That's our church's new tag line. I LOVE IT. What a statement. Hello everyone! This particular part of God's Bride's body is about authentically representing Jesus. And what I am most thrilled about with this new "push" is the dual nature of what "authenticity" means. And I was thinking at first, cool. I can do that. I can be authentic (cause I'm thinkin' all about it cause of my friend Andrea's blog : ) ). But it's not just about me being me and being real. There is undeniable glory for Him when He brings me out of sin and into a restored relationship with Him. Amen? But there's another piece...The idea of authentically representing JESUS to people. Wow. I don't typically do a very good job of really, really looking like Him. Tall order, huh? Requires something entirely different than just being me and being willing to share my faults and God's power to overcome them with other people. So I have to be on my game. On His game! And how great that I get to hide away behind Him and let Him be bigger than me. I don't like how I represent NEAR as much as I like the way He loves on people. So my new endeavor is to be what people think Jesus looks like. Weird, but when you think about it, it would make sense that His physical appearance would look like, well.....everyone. And the spiritual appearance, well we are to press on toward that prize of holiness, right? So, inside, those who claim Him bear His mark anyway....

Good grief, I muddy the waters though. I get in the way. I am hopefully flawed. Full of hope that He who began a good work in me will carry it through to completion to the glory of God the Father. Why is it so stinkin' hard? This nature that nurses pride and self-glorification. That swears over and over that I need "me-time"--what the heck!? It's not about me! Yeah. If I could just remember that. It's not enough to want it. As Brian pointed out to me not too long ago, "There is no such thing as 'try'. There is only 'do' or 'do not do'." Try is removed from the equation because it is transitory. It simply means you are about to 'do' something or 'not do' something. It's the decision. It's deceptive though, isn't it, because when we say we're trying to do something, we almost, almost give ourselves credit for it. As if it's almost as good as done. I'm going to think more about that one.......I'm in my circular thinking pattern, and that means that I'm about to get really boring and a little nutty on paper.

Have a blessed day. Don't try to. Just do. See it all as a blessing. No matter what it is. Much love, Crista (now running in circles in my head....)

My baby boy is 5...

We had Mr. Noah's 5 year birthday celebration this afternoon. Of course, we had it at "the gymnastics place" every parent's favorite birthday spot! I took so much delight in watching my sweet boy have the time of his life. I really believe he might have. He ran. He jumped. He rolled. He FLEW--those precious coaches who are magical with children, literally THREW him several feet in the air. Don't worry. He landed on foam. Laughing hysterically! I tell you what, it could've been a Mastercard "Priceless" commercial. The three men who were the coaches for the party were just perfect. They let Noah crawl all over them. They are incredibly good at what they do. They let the kids, particularly the little boys, push pretty far, just until it almost gets out of hand, and then they redirect them. That sounds a little wild, but in reality, it is such a unique experience for boys. It gives them a certain wildness and energy that I cannot give them at home in the safest way they can possibly have it and it still be meaningful. It's GREAT. The whole thing is great because it let's them be what they were created to be. WILD and uninhibited and free. It's something that's lost to our society. We do not let our men be men. So many little boys are being raised by mothers (or child-care givers) because daddy works ALL the time. Some moms are good at being boy-moms, but very, very few are the moms that can make boys men. That's something that I, speaking for myself, cannot get a grasp on. I get the need to be outside and rough and dominate, but I cannot teach my kids that because I am a woman. I don't get it any more than they will ever get that I need to talk about my feelings. Well, I guess I'll try to teach them that, but I think they'll probably just learn that they need to do it. Not why they need to do it. Because they're MEN. And I want them to be that way.....

I digress. I have to finish the birthday account. He picked a cute pirate theme--not scary Pirates of the Caribbean but cartoon-y pirates. And he wanted a cupcake cake that looked like an undersea scene. Can I just tell you how much BLUE icing it took to make that cupcake cake look like the ocean?! WOW. It was a LOT of blue. Everywhere. And you will be able to tell which kids from the neighborhood or church were at Noah's party because of the blue ring around their mouths for a week!

The most wonderful part of the party--even surpassing watching them have so much free fun--was what Noah said on the way home. "Mama," he said. "Yes, Noah?" I said. "I had so much fun." I melted. That was the sweet, sweet sound of a grateful heart. That is so typical of his wonderful soul. I will treasure that short conversation forever. He is my angel. In little boy skin. He is my heart. So wanted. So admired. So loved. Thank you, God, for my son.

Another notch in the belt of parenthood...

I now know what a febrile seizure looks like. It looks scary. Especially on your own child. Elli came up with a fever yesterday afternoon, so I gave her Motrin. Before her next dose though, she spiked (like from 98.6 to 102.5 within 5 minutes) another temp and ended up having a fever induced fever. Sooooo.....we ended up in the ER. She was a trooper despite the fact that she HATED the IV tubing and pulse-ox thingy on her big toe. It was so sad. There was much wringing of hands and lip quivering.

I have to say though, that we felt so blessed by the people that rushed to our side to take care of us and the boys so we could take care of Elli. Rodney and Lisa made themselves available to take Caleb and Noah (who were so precious and concerned and sweet to their sister), Gammy came to the ER to be with us and help out, and Pop kept Caleb and Noah at home so they could go to bed. I absolutely treasured something that one of my wonderful new friends did for ME. It was so sweet and selfless because she has children of her own and it was almost 10 o'clock at night, but Julie J. came up to the hospital to wait with Elli and I when she found out that Brian had to leave to do some car shuffling. I was sitting there on that horrible stretcher trying to get Elli to sleep and just praying for God's protection for her when I looked up, and there was Julie. It was an amazing ministry to me at that point. She knew in her heart I needed her there when I didn't even know it myself. I will never forget that. We haven't known the J's for long, but they are already very close friends. I am so thankful for them and the way they saw our need and filled it. I believe 100% that the Holy Spirit prompted them to do what they did, all of those who helped us, and it meant so much and made a difficult situation so much more bearable.

This is the first time Elli has been very distressed and ill since she came home to us. It did my heart good in the midst of all of the craziness, that she wanted no one but Mama. It sounds silly, but with this precious, adopted child, who sometimes seems to love me and hate me all at the same time, the fact that she wanted me alone in that moment encouraged me that our relationship is growing and becoming strong. It is the way it's supposed to be, but I've learned not to take any of these things for granted.

Right now, Elli is doing very well. She is napping and we have the fever under control. She is on Tamiflu and Amoxicillin to "cover the bases", according to the ER doctor. Sounds good to me! Please keep praying for her complete recovery.

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Then, when we came home after midnight and I was going through Caleb's backpack to see what homework he hadn't done for today, I discovered a letter from his principal letting us know that he is this term's recipient of the Citizenship Award. I am so happy that the leaders at his school have truly seen his amazing heart and character and that he will be rewarded for his hard work. The award is to recognize the following (as per the letter we got): following directions immediately, getting to class on time, completing work on time, working quietly and not disturbing others, respecting and getting along well with others, walking quietly in the building (I love that one :)), keeping hands, feet, and objects to self, respecting school property and the property of others, honesty (wow!), following all rules, and being helpful to adults and other. My mommy-heart is BURSTING! The letter also says that, "We know that honors of this type should be justly shared by the parents who provide the encouragement, guidance, and discipline necessary for this outstanding achievement." To God be the glory for giving us such an infallible plan to follow! Where would we be without His guidance and direction as our perfect parent! Oh, that I would please Him in my parenting of my three precious, unique, darling children. What a privilege it is to give a little as a parent and have your beautiful boy take that little offering you have given and make it into everything you never dreamed it could so fully be. A person filled with character and integrity that blesses the lives of those who know him. I am well pleased with my son.

With both sons. I do not want to overlook Noah in this because something I am seeing in him this past month--his birthday month! He is manifesting such determined self-discipline as I have never seen in a child. Noah is a free spirit in the truest sense. He is not bound by the expectations of others because he lives by his own code--his drive to discover and his extreme thirst for knowledge. He is so wonderfully kind and gentle in his pursuits though, and what I am so amazed at with this self-discipline thing is that he is determined to address adults with respect. He is forcing himself to say yes, ma'am and sir, and no, ma'am and sir, please, thank you, and your welcome. He corrects himself. This is huge for him because I have seen in him a lack of concentration and ability to multitask apart from his "questing", but these past couple of weeks, I have seen him determined to improve himself in this way. It is so inspiring to see my littlest boy work so hard on himself!

So yeah. I am pretty much on cloud 9 right now. My darling daughter is better, my oldest son is receiving a special award, and my youngest son is growing himself! It's good to be a mom. With another notch in my belt. Maybe that's why mom's get chubby? They need bigger waists to accommodate all the notches?........Tired but joyful, Crista

PS....I'm going to work on taking pictures. Sorry I don't have any to post right now. It's an area I need to grow in. Maybe Noah'll help me?.......